I bring the worst of the worst of all things This Writer of The Blog. That Most Disgusting and Primal of writing: Instant Messaging.
(Co-written by Teresa of T-Zone negligence, without her knowledge.)
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Rebecca : You'd think zombie would be a little more, well, rotten. Are you sure it's not more Vampire?
Teresa: I guess you're a Vampire.
Rebecca : lol
Rebecca : I'm typing lol. I'm typing, but I'm not laughing. [
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=up-RX_YN7yA ]
Rebecca : lim [Laugh In Mind, a term that I didn’t come up with. A friend of a friend, who’s also a friend, did.]
Teresa: Ah.
Rebecca : Yup....
Rebecca : lipsmack.
Teresa: O.o
Rebecca : I'm sitting here silently, feeling like I'm in the middle of a satisfied pause after a good, long conversation.
Rebecca : Doing the whole lipsmacking thing.
Rebecca : Grinning goofily, listening to the Mid-West music in my head.
Rebecca : It's kinda hillbilly.
Rebecca : And yet more akin to country, and little bit like Spaghetti Western.
Teresa: >.> ...Are you...a nutcase?
Rebecca : No, I'm a Rockbiter!
Teresa: A Rockbiter?!
Rebecca : But, wait.... am I a Rockbiting Vampire now?
Rebecca : Nooooooo!
Rebecca : Nooooooo!
Rebecca : Noooooooo!
Rebecca : I dropped my ice.....
Teresa: XDDD
Rebecca : Susss.
Teresa: Hm?
Rebecca : You need to answer the species question.
Rebecca : I'm so confused.
Rebecca : Self-unidentified.
Rebecca : I can't continue on like this! Can't you understand!
Teresa: I guess...you're...a Becca.
Rebecca : And that's a species now...
Teresa: It is. It's an alien.
Rebecca : The allmighty... Becca.
Rebecca : Oh, an alien.
Teresa: Yes.
Rebecca : ...From what planet?
Teresa: Beccaisms.
Teresa: No, wait!
Teresa: You're a Beccaism from the planet Becca!
Rebecca : Beccaism is a species?
Rebecca : Beccabrainanism?
Teresa: XD
Teresa: LOL!
Rebecca : For reals?
Rebecca : Me too! Lolling!
Teresa: XD
Rebecca : So, what do they on Planet Beccasm - Wait, that name sounds questionable.. - Beccabrainaism?
Rebecca : Mastodons?
Teresa: I...don't know.
Teresa: You tell me.
Rebecca : Hairy Mammoths?
Rebecca : They probably draw cave drawings too.
Rebecca : Of all them Vermicious K’nids.
Rebecca : Or the Lix.....
Teresa: Hm. Lixx.
Teresa: Nasty group
Rebecca : Masterhope, no! Stay away!
Teresa: o.o
Rebecca : It's trying to sell me porn, you know.
Rebecca : But, I won't have it. It's got no flavor.
Teresa: O.o Oh...
Rebecca : Now who told you that you could spell Lix with two Xx's.
Teresa: I like it that way. XD
Rebecca : Why?
Rebecca : Does the second x (sultry voice, that I don't actually have) empower you?
Teresa: XD
Enter a long pause.
Rebecca : Which seems to be pretty normal for IM conversations. It's amazing how we can be talking about something, leave for 15-20 mins, and pick right back up where we left off.
Rebecca : Simply stunning.
Rebecca : And yet we don't even think a second thought about, except for me right now.
Rebecca : As opposed to me right later, when I won't think about it anymore.
Rebecca : We, or I rather, can talk about this for a good half hour and then we'll go right back to the other thing, simply by scrolling up.
Rebecca : I wonder who invented scrolling up?
Rebecca : I wonder why my brain starts think in bad British-impersonation accents when I start rambling like this?
Rebecca : Do you ever think in bad British-impersonation accents?
Teresa: Nope.
Rebecca : Never?
Teresa: Nope.
Rebecca : Well bollocks to you.
Rebecca : (Incidentally, Bollocks comes from an Anglo-Saxon word meaning testicles, so it may not be in proper form to use from now on, hm?.....)
Teresa: O.o
Teresa: Ew.
Rebecca : Yah...
Teresa: Ewwwwwwwwwww.
Rebecca : Actually, Prick is also slang for the same thing, so I should probably refrain from that from now on.
Rebecca : Ah, yes. The harsh truth about slang.
Rebecca : But enough of such trivial, yet disgusting, things.
Rebecca : Let us dance, DANCE!
Teresa: O.O
Rebecca : (Enter the waltz, which I'm doing alone.)
Teresa: *turns on music*
Rebecca : Wah! You can't do that, I was singing some- wait, is it for the dance, or are you just tuning it out?
Teresa: The dance.
Rebecca : What song?
Rebecca : Or, speaking in time, What song-a?
Teresa: "Can I have this dance", from HSM3. XD
Rebecca : Ner!
Teresa: Fine.
Rebecca : I hardly even remember that one.
Teresa: Dance to this. XD
Rebecca : I don't think you can do the Waltz to that one. Or even the Salsa.
Teresa: XD
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Loves Me Not - Tatu.wav
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Rebecca : Maybe a Waltz on highspeed. (Is that even a Waltz anymore?)
Rebecca : Nope, doesn't count right.
Rebecca : It'll have to be the Macarena. You can do the Macarena to anything.
Rebecca : Even the Barnie song ("I love you"). Try it.
Rebecca : If you time it right, you can do the hugging during the hugging line.
Rebecca : Maybe.
(Another pause....)
Rebecca : Are you actually doing it?
Teresa: No.
Rebecca : Oh....
Rebecca : I was gonna put it on Youtube and everything....
Teresa: YOU do it and embarrass yourself.
Rebecca : Not until the Star-spangled Banner on the duck call is up.
Teresa: Eh.
Rebecca : Not your cup of tea?
Rebecca : (Darjeeling, darling?)
Rebecca : (And yet another pause.... Nooooooo! My Phoooooone!)
Teresa: Phone?
Rebecca : Yes, the one I dropped.
Rebecca : But, that's not important.
Teresa: You dropped it?
Rebecca : Oh, no! That's not important. Haha-ha-haha.
Teresa: ...
Rebecca : No it didn't smash into a million pieces. Pleasedon'ttelldad.
Teresa: O.o
Teresa: What?
(She comes down to check...)
Rebecca : I lied.
Teresa: Liar!
Teresa: Just like [Aaaactually this was a private joke.]
Rebecca : No, I declare a moratorium on all things related!
Rebecca : I thought we covered that back in slang!
Teresa: XD
Rebecca : It's surprisingly hard to keep the momentum going, you know? Maybe that's why there’s been more successful solo comedians. I mean, when was the last time you actually heard a decent comedy skit done by more than one parson.
Rebecca : Or a parson at all, for that matter.
Rebecca : Not to call us comedians, which is somewhat presumptuous. That would be assuming that we're funny.
Rebecca : And it's an awfully funny person who assumes his funny without outside input.
(Moooore Awkward Silence-Maaaaan!)
BUZZ!!!
Teresa: I had nothing to say.
Teresa: Stop buzzing me.
Rebecca : You're killing the momentum.
Teresa: Eh. I think Spider Near is more interesting.
Rebecca : You're ruining the great big joke I have in store for you.
Teresa: Hm?
Rebecca : You wanna know?
Teresa: Sure
Rebecca : I'm gonna post this whooooole conversation on my blog!
Teresa: Really?
Rebecca : Bye!