Back to the strong, tall lesson plan.

Hello, class. It's me, Miss Becca. Oh, I know I haven't showed up since way back in the first post, but I assure you that you still can't pronounce my name.... Or maybe....
But anyway. Today's lesson will be "How to murder a car horn".
With this necessary driving skill you'll be able to both freak out and annoy other drivers worldwide. And without the use of a car alarm even!

Now getting onto the lesson... First, get into a car; no you don't need a license for this. Then, drive over to choice intersection. (Make it busy and Seattle like.) When the timing is right, raise your fist high in the air and bring it down hard on the horn, repeat. Repeat as many times as you like or until the light turns green. For example...

See this young woman in a Seattle street? There are cars on all sides of her, and the one directly in front has just started backing up a bit out of the cross walk. But the car and the crossing people are irrelevant. But, seeing this already awkward behavior of the car in front of her, she decided it'd be a perfect place to practice this fine art.
Look how she skillfully raises her arm into the air and beats on the horn like a merciless, wild beast. It really freaked out the people in front of her. Ah, she's repeating! Behold as she takes no breaks in beating that horn to death. That's the ticket, no mercy. Show that horn who's boss. Ah, your an inspiration to us all. Oo, that doesn't look good. The poor horn...

Oh, look the lights turned green and traffic is on it's way as it should be, with no lasting damage.
Except for the poor people in front of her, some of which believe they may have triggered this soundly assault. Quite spooked they where. Thank you, mam, for you beautiful example on "How to murder a car horn".

Now that we've seen a most spectacular example, class, let us all get in the cars and try it ourselves. And remember not to try this around a cop! (Just a safety precaution.)
Also, try not to hurt yourselves, or if you do don't expect me to take responsibility for it. In fact, it'd probably be better if you didn't try this in real life at all. Bt I'm sure it'd make a great stress reliever, so don't diss this lesson all together.
See you next week class!

Dedicated to that stranger.

One day, while checking my e-mail, I discovered the most uncanny thing. A comment related to this blog. Could it be? Where people really reading my blog? Did they really comment? Did that mean that they read more then the first post in site. No! But it did mean that more then total strangers where reading it. Ah, the sheer thought of it brings tears of joy to my eyes. I feel so...(sniff) accomplished.
The comment was short and sweet, consisting of two little words.
you suck
Written just like that, only in a smaller font. Ah, to think that this secret admirer would choose such words to express passion....Where is this going?
Anyway, I felt so touched by this that I decided to reply. I sent him such words as:
You know, you really should learn constructive criticism.
Or...
Ah, thank you. But next time, please specify what I'm sucking on.
Bear in mind that this wasn't exactly what I said, but it's sure what I thought.

Now, the commented on subject was apparently the one Mary helped me write. You know, the one with the weird character that wasn't even sure what it was. (It was a character she used in a video game, by the way. So, Empusa was the name of the class she was playing as.)
But I really must ask, was it the interview that sucked? Or the character? Or maybe it was the info down below. If not any of that, was "you suck" directed at me, or my 8 year old sister who helped me write it? Or maybe just the whole blog. But it's wonderful to know that you read that much..........whatever your name was.

Oh, but I feel a pain in my heart whenever I think that I may never see that commenter again.
That one soul who inspired me to write this post. Lo! had no idea what to do before this. Thank you, thank you once again.
Oh, commenter....who's name I've forgotten already, I'll try to forget you soon. No, I did not forget any words...at least I think didn't.

P.S.
These words where supposed to be invisible, but they got to lazy to be. They just got pink instead.

Let's be honest.

I actually had something really cool planned, but I forgot it. So, I tried to replace it with the interviews below. Remind me never to do that again.

Right here should be a picture. It's invisible. It's so invisible that not even the computer can see it. Yah, it's that invisible. But it says how sorry I am that those interviews ever made it to the light of day....along with my spelling.

Bring bring
Bring bring
I sing
In the spring
Tring-a-ling
Stop this thing
Bring Ring

(And it continues off into darkness.)

Featuring Mary's character.

"Good Evening."
Whoa, it appears our guest arrived early and spoke out of script. Well, it might help to learn her name. And the name is........Maiako!

Maiako: Good Evening, good evening. What's your name?
The Host: Welcome, Maiako. I'm The Host, and it's morning.
Maiako: Oh, sorry.
The Host: So, Maiako. Can you tell us a little about yourself?
Maiako: Well, I am an empusa.
The Host:..... An Empusa. Give me moment.

This is where I looked in the dictionary, both of them. Nothing.

The Host: Ookay, so can you tell me what an Empusa is?
Maiako: Well, it takes life. And it can use thunderbolt. That's its techniques. This is a scary place.
The Host: Ookay...again. So, what do you find scary about this place?
Maiako: Well, I'm playing a video game.
The Host: I see, so it's a scary game.
Maiako: Unless you get used to it.
The Host: Hmm. What's your favorite food?
Maiako: Mmm, Teriyaki Chicken, that's my favorite food.
The Host: And drink?
Maiako: Uuh, strawberry punch cool-aid.
The Host: Do you have any hobbies?
Maiako: Nope.
The Host: Well, that was frank. Well, you seem to be pretty busy.
Maiako: I am.
The Host: I wasn't finished yet. So, I'll let you continue your game in peace.
Maiako: No, it's okay.
The Host: No, I insist.

Maiako was to absorbed in the game and could not reply. But, to fill up the rest of the time I'll put down what info I've found on what an Empusa is.

Also known as Empousa, Empousai, Mormo, Mormolykeia, and Lamia.
Some sources state that Empusa is one person, while others indicate that there’s more then one.
Either way, they/she is defined as being the daughter of the Greek goddess Hecate.
She's described as having the bronze feet, and having the ability to turn into a beautiful woman.
It states that she waits by the road and eats passing by travelers.

Other sources say that they seem to be a half-ass/half woman creature capable of turning into either a beautiful woman or cow. It's said that she likes to suck every last drop out of travelers or men, and that they can be scared away by insulting them.

This info was found with Google and is not guaranteed to be correct.

Featuring Victoria's character.

This time we're featuring the character of Victoria, this Fourth Sister. The one that's younger then Teresa, but older then Mary. You'll know her. Anyway....
The character in today’s featurett iiiiis............ ARON!
Wait, didn't the other one mention........ Anyway, I use "anyway" far too often. After some strange mishap that called the character into a space cannal (?) we started the interview.

Becca: Aron, I am your father.
Aron: Nnno your not.
Becca: You are my son, and the one true king.
Aron: Stop quoting Lion King.
Becca: It's all so magical.
Aron: What's all so magical?
Becca: Do you believe in magic?
Aron: I have magic.
Becca: You can fly, you can fly, you can fly!
Aron: Yes, but stop quoting Peter Pan.
Becca: I'm not Peter Pan, he is.
Aron: Are you recording this?
Becca: I will never ever ever ever ever make a song about the Sibbie.
Aron: Heehee, that's so silly. Why are you quoting Strong Bad?
Becca: Intervention!
Aron: Just a bite.

This is where we take a break. I took a broken leg, while he took a broken egg.
When we put them together it created a green smoke that engulfed China and healed my leg at the same time. And, no, I have nothing against the Chinese.
We now return to our feature presentation.

Becca: Long live the King!
Aron:.........What?
Becca: Hail, King Arthur!
Aron: Wwwhat about Arthur?
Becca: We eat ham and jam and Spam a lot.
Aron: Why do you eat ham and jam and Spam a lot? I sure hope you don't eat them together.
Becca:....
Aron: Donut!
Becca: King Rupurt, may he rest in peace.
Aron:.......What's that from again? Oh, yeah. It's from Prin-

This is the point I stick duct tape over his mouth and have another intermission.
On with the show!

Aron: Why'd you do that!?
Becca:.....
Another intermission, this time the argument is settled. (Or put off, whichever comes first.)

Aron: So, why are you interviewing us?
Becca: Ready or not, here I come.
Aron: .....I have a gun and I know how to use it.
Becca: I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream.
Aron: Enough of this, the weird-o's.
Becca: I wonder......
Aron: You..wonder... what?
Becca: Wanna hear a secret?
Aron: No.
Becca: Th-th-th-th- That's all folks!
Aron: Bye.

After he was ejected out of the space canal and into the dark void I was left to my thoughts.
"That'll show 'em guest stars."

Featuring Teresa's character.

This time, folks, we're featuring the character of Third Sister Teresa. (Me being the Second, with Ellie as the First.) And what character has she chosen to let us feature?(Drum roll) ..............................(A cow bell clangs)........................Yuukii! (Cymbals crash.)

(Warning, if you have a strong dislike for script format then run for the hills.... And I'm using way to much parentheses.)
Now I don't know this character, so this interview turned out very interesting. It started out when I walked up to a wall and said...
Me:.......Booya.Then a voice from somewhere else said...
Yuukii: Why are you talking to the wall?
My sister told me that her character was sitting on the wall. But that's beside the point, so let's just skip to the point where I'm actual interviewing him.
Me: So, Yuukii. Are you a girl, or a guy?
Yuukii: I'm a guy!
Me: Hmm, very interesting. Is it just me, or do most effeminate males have either a U and/or Y in there name, or just know someone like that? Never mind, confusing question.
Yuukii:Yyyaaah, that was confusing.
Me: I'd imagine so. So, Yuukii, can you tell us a little about yourself?
Yuukii: Mmm. Well, I'm a god of death.
Me: Isn't everyone.
Yuukii: Actually, no they're not. I have another half, but it's kinda confusing. Is this being recorded?
Me: I can assure you that no audio record of this will be kept.
Yuukii: Yah, sure. You'll just write it down. What are you, a reporter?
Me:I had a banana once.
Yuukii: Baf! What the heck was that about?
Me: Why did you say "baf" instead of actually hitting me? Never mind, I'll ask the questions.
Yuukii: What are you doing now?
Me: I ask, you answer. Have you ever eaten a split with a girl you liked?
Yuukii: I don't have a girl I like. Yuran does, but uuuuuuuh. She doesn't like him back. She's a sweet girl, when she's not utterly kicking his butt. Hehe, it's pathetic.
Me:I didn't come to hear about Yuran.
Yuukii: Why not, we're the same person.
Me: Which would mean that you DO have a crush.
Yuukii: NNeeh. Somewhere, deep inside, in a place that Yuran has. She regards me as a friend, no more.
Me: Skip to the interesting parts, darling.
Yuukii: Ah, I thought it was interesting!
Me: Have you every seen a lady bug... Never mind. Intermission!

And an intermission takes place, consisting of a white screen, some dialog I don't wanna bother typing, and half a minute.

Me: Okay, we're ready to go.
Yuukii:Oh, okay. Bye, Aron!
Me: Getting back on subject, tell me a little more about yourself....And I tap my fingers together.
Yuukii: Why do you tap your fingers together, that's just silly. Why do you say you tap your fingers together?
Me: More... about yourself....
Yuukii: Well, I'll need a question before I answer anything about myself. Ask me a question about myself.... I like Harry Potter.
Me: .....If I told you to get a shot gun, would you?
Yuukii: I've got one right here.

My eyes went wide as I saw him cock the gun. I stood up, turned around, and ran away screaming... "THE KITCHENS AROUND THE CORNER!"
I probably fell off a cliff after and will miraculously be back for the next blog.

Yuukii:.....Are we done?

Warning this is a set.

Have you ever noticed that if you spell Tea Set as T'set it spells test backwards. But that's beside the point. I'm gonna do a series of interveiws in succession. Each one featuring someones character. I'm going to do them the same day as this post, which would put the warning under it. Thus, this post is probably redundant, unless people read it in chronilogical order. (That being, from bottom to top.) So, if you actually read in order of date, then read this messege first and enjoy the interveiws soon to crush it.

This week featuring something not put out by Disney/Matell.

Old McDonald had a farm.
( E I E I Oh)
And on that farm he built a restaurant.
(E I E I Oh)
With a burger here, and some fries over there.
Here a meal, there a meal, everywhere a meal, meal.
Old McDonald had a farm
(E I E I Oh)

Old McDonald had a restaurant.
(E I E I Oh)
And in that restaurant he had a special.
(E I E I Oh)
With a sale right here, and a deal over there.
Here a deal, there a deal, everywhere a deal, deal.
Old McDonald had a restaurant.
(E I E I Oh)

Old McDonald had a business.
(E I E I Oh)
And then that business put out a toy.
(E I E I Oh)
With a bleep over squeek over here, and a squigily-boink there.
Here a noise, there a noise, everwhere there's noise, noise.
Old McDonald had a business.
(E I E I Oh)

Old McDonald had a trademark.
(E I E I Oh)
And under that trademark he had a mascot.
(E I E I Oh)
With a change over here, and some cheap art there...
Here a mascot, there a mascot, every where’s he's got the mascot.
Old McDonald had a trademark.
(E I E I Oh)

Old McDonald bought the farm.
(E I E I Boohoohoo)
And on that farm he pushed up posies.
(E I E I Oohoohoo)
But...
He left a burger here, and some fries over there...
And a sale right here, and a deal over there...
A bleep over squeak over here, and a squigily-boink there...
A change over here, and some cheap art there...
Old McDonald had a farm, but that was a long time ago.
(Please stretch last note.)

This song brought to you by the "Hey, I'm still on the toilet" group. Any inaccuracies and trademark infringements are probably entirely intentional. 2005 Not Trademarked.