Supporting the theory that adversary is necessary.

A few days ago, maybe a week or two by now, Teresa used a word that I normally disagree with the usage of. Which is why I'm iffy about this entry itself. Anyway, back to the explanation.
The word in question was none other then "asshole".
Normally I just pass this off as unpleasant and ignore it. But something about it got me thinking this particualr time.
After great rant like contenplation I became awakened to the importance of the "asshole."

Let us start from he beganing. What exactly is an asshole?
It's the hole in your butt that crap comes out of. This may seem like a rather gross and unpleasant thing, but it's actually very important.
Without the asshole one would not be able to releive there body of waste and would eventually die from it.

Like wise, when you call a person such a thing you imply that crap comes out of them.
Nobody likes crap. I don't like crap, the cats don't like crap, Rudolf doesn't like it.
But it's still necessary.
If we didn't receive this load of crap, or problem, we would never learn to overcome it and thus would be without growth.
So, you see, the asshole is necessary.

I would like to apologize for any rude, crude, or offensive material in this or the last post.
If you find yourself offended by these posts please mention so in a comment at the bottom.
I would like to keep these posts as enjoyable for the reader as my ability permits.
Thank you for reading through to the end.

Todays fortune is..."E"?

So I was taking the caps off of bottles and discussing the In Bed game, when I remembered something that I might throw on this blog.

"It really depends on the context in bed."
Wait, no. That wasn't what I was thinking, that's not even mine. I didn't even word it right. I didn't even start the blog righ-
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
We are sorry to have to cut this opening short. There is no cause for the technical dificulties this session is experiencing.
If it so pleases you, please blame: your national government leader, the bus driver with the glasses and facial hair, or the Lack of Sleep Foundation.

Further more, as a sad attempt to appease the angry masses, we now present you with this pointless piece of "entertainment".

Your fortune today.....

"Stop searching, happiness is right next to you."
Sadly, it married your neighbor.

"The last wish you made will come true."
Darn, I knew I shouldn't 'ave wasted it on that taco.

"Your mind, being creative and original, will make you famous."
To bad you'll be burned for witchcraft before they recognize your true value.

"You will soon receive compliments on your style."
Oh, my gosh. That is so cool! Are you supposed to be a clown?

"A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance."
But a single heart maketh a man with more money.

"A sudden change in plans will lead to good fortune."
See above.

"You were born with the skill to easily communicate with people."
"Fun and excitement will soon be yours."
At the expense of your very shy brother, of course.

"You are mentally alert, put your mind to good use."
You hear that? That's the sound of your parents trying to get you off the games.

"A worthy cause will apreciate your generousity."
Also known as "Come downstairs and let us know your alive." But will you allow them such a luxury?

"Concentrating leads to success."
No, that doesn't mean to spend more time in front of the t.v. screen.

"You and your loved ones will be happy in your life together."
And since your spending the next 50 years in jail together you better learn to.

"Satuday and Sunday stack odds in your favor."
Why can't the normal people ever favor you....

"This time is suitable for long -range plans and goals."
It's a good time to go huntin'!

"Miss the bus on purpose."
'Cause you really don't need to see that creepy guy with the glasses.

"You have a yearning for perfection."
Grow up already, she doesn't exist.

"You shall long make an overdue personal decision."
But, we didn't need to know how long it's been since you change your underwear.

"Make serious decisions in the last few days of the month."
By the way, your land-lord called about the rent again.

"Fear creates danger and courage dispels it."
........... Weren't we just talking tommorows math test?

"You will win favors when you expand your social circle."
Hey, could you do me a big, big, BIG favor? Oh, yeah. And can you do Karen's too?

"You can be lucky today regarding your creative talents."
But it's more the exception then the rule.

"Your self confidence is warranted."
And it looks like it's expired.

"Give something away."
Are you implying something? And you might not want to open that closet.

"Do a head stand."
Wow, how'd you know I had the hicups?

"Walk barefoot in the grass."
'Cause the sidewalks to hot this time of year.

"Nature, Time, and Patience are the three great physicians."
Do they take walk-ins?

Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

This blog has been brought to you in part by people that've accumilated far to many pop bottles.
And also by Jones Soda....
And wherever they get the fortunes on top......